Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Blending worlds

I read a lot.  And look at photos. And spend time on social media. I have my parameters where my online world ends and my other one starts.  But increasingly those lines are blurring.  And I'm guessing I'm not alone.

 I have friends online that I have never met.  And when I do meet them in the flesh (as happened last week at the Sydney Writers Centre meet-up for my writerly peeps,) they are every bit as lovely as I imagined.  
Many of these friendships have formed through a kind of courtship online played out on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. Maybe it's the anonymity of the online world, but it's easier to share thoughtfully while at home with a bowl of almonds and a heater and snug slippers on, than it is while standing in the school yard with three backpacks on and carrying a trumpet.  
I like heart felt, I like deep, I always have.  I'm the kind of person who is useless at small talk but if you meet me at a function I'll bury you in a sea of "what's your favourite memory" or "what country do you desperately want to visit in your life time".  And once you're trapped, I'll dig deeper until you'll regret ever wandering over in my direction.  That's especially the case if the waiter with the drinks tray has strayed past me a couple of times as well.

But the joy of online is that you can find all kinds of specialness.  We have so many fabulous "projects" that have been embraced such as Fatmumslim's hugely popular "Photo A Day" challenge, the various grateful projects, and the many other activities online that encourage you to dig a little deeper inside yourself and share with the world, what you think or feel or see.

And yes, I agree, don't just save this for the online world, share this generous, thoughtful you with your everyday world as well, don't keep this you a secret.
Sometimes The Husband come homes and my peaceful writing cocoon I live in during school hours is a distant memory with me ferrying my kids to various playdates, sports and music activities, he gets the dregs.  I struggle amongst the clutter of dinner and homework and fighting and keeping kids off the electronics to remember this feeling of calm and special thoughts.  We talk the mundane and the practical when I really want to share the nice stuff, not the ordinary. 

So there is my challenge - to take my special and bring it into my normal.  To share this me with the me that my world sees.

Do you live a double life?  How have you brought your special into your normal?


  1. I've been told by my family that I'm more fun when I'm with my friends than when I'm with my kids (wine might have something to do with that). And i'm much friendlier at work, not to mention more efficient, than I am in the domestic world. So there's a lot of work there to bring my special into my normal.

    1. Maybe we just are trying to use the one benchmark of what we consider the "better" us and apply it to all areas of our lives, when really it's ok to be "less friendly" or "less efficient" etc at home because thats our place we have our down time. We don't always need to be "on". Way too many speech marks used in that sentence, but do you get what I mean? Thanks for the perspective Becci, and I am guilty of the above too!

  2. Oh how I related to this post! I am just as chatty online as offline however my online world is sometimes taking over! Should I worry when my kids start commenting when I take a photo - is that going on Facebook or Twitter!?! I agree there is such much specialness out there online but agree we must translate it to our own world and offline life. This week on holiday for a big event I want to share the experience with my online world (and I need to stay in touch because of the event) but I also need to be in the present, relax and enjoy the days with my husband and friends and take time out for myself. The dilemmas of modern life!

  3. Ah Lisa, you are a perfect example! We haven't met in person although we've chatted by phone but I know that when we meet, we'll get on brilliantly. And I feel that we're at the event as well with the photos, blog posts and excitement you're sharing. I think if you can put your hand on your heart and say the online and the offline me's, are real and authentic and not trying to be something I'm truly not, then both worlds will happily mesh one day. I see it happening in my own!